The results came back positive for a recurrence of Brian's cancer. 

I am a pretty stoic person.  I have had many negative things happen in my life (both of my parents are gone, been through a divorce, etc.) and I seem on the outside to handle it all in stride.  Must be leftover from my dad telling us as we were growing up that we Buckners were strong people and we didn't show emotion or cry in public.  What people don't know is that inside I am a major wreck.  I fall apart really late at night or while I am taking a shower.  I don't know why the shower, it just seems to bring some sort of catharsis.

Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers as this round begins.  There is an colonoscopy on the 5th of May.  After that, probably a surgery and then possibly more chemo.  The Dr. didn't want to talk about chemo today, but we are pretty sure that will be in the works.  Last time they took out all signs of cancer, but Brian went through chemo anyway in case there were residual microscopic cells lingering in the bloodstream.  So, the thought is that if they take it all out now we will have to go through the same thing.

We will keep you all posted, unless it becomes too much for us.

Oh, the irony....Today in the mail we got an invitation to go to the Relay for Life..a cancer survivors event.  Technically, he is a survivor...with a re-currence.

 

I'm sorry to hear this, Lee Anne. Know that your both in my prayers and thoughts.

---

http://sportstoday.proboards58.com

LeeAnne:

The results came back positive for a recurrence of Brian's cancer. 

I am a pretty stoic person.  I have had many negative things happen in my life (both of my parents are gone, been through a divorce, etc.) and I seem on the outside to handle it all in stride.  Must be leftover from my dad telling us as we were growing up that we Buckners were strong people and we didn't show emotion or cry in public.  What people don't know is that inside I am a major wreck.  I fall apart really late at night or while I am taking a shower.  I don't know why the shower, it just seems to bring some sort of catharsis.

Please continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers as this round begins.  There is an colonoscopy on the 5th of May.  After that, probably a surgery and then possibly more chemo.  The Dr. didn't want to talk about chemo today, but we are pretty sure that will be in the works.  Last time they took out all signs of cancer, but Brian went through chemo anyway in case there were residual microscopic cells lingering in the bloodstream.  So, the thought is that if they take it all out now we will have to go through the same thing.

We will keep you all posted, unless it becomes too much for us.

Oh, the irony....Today in the mail we got an invitation to go to the Relay for Life..a cancer survivors event.  Technically, he is a survivor...with a re-currence.

 

LeeAnne:  You cry all you need too, all your tears will go to God, he will hear you.. I'll send all of my friends an email for prayers, for you and Brian. Possibly we can get tons of prayers delivered, the more the better. God bless you and give you the strength to carry this load. (cricket) 

All things considered....I have been blessed in the fact that the tests show everything contained.  Also,  another diagnostic exam is to reveal the next move.  Yes I get what seems like "extra" mileage in the x-ray department.  It pays to know early what we are up against as we are more prepared to deal with this than ever.  A positive attitude is with me always as each case is different.  These doctors are the best and prove so with each visit.    Wait and see that this setback may be a small hurdle in our lives!

Always know that you have a huge crowd of people standing with you and praying for the best.  You are a strong family and will pull through this once more.  Stay strong and rely on each other. 

We are behind you guys completely and will do whatever you need. Your family is in our thoughts and prayers!

My condolances Leeanne. Hopefully they caught it in time. Hang in there and keep your chin up, and can work out.

When we decided to do this last December, we knew we would be putting ourselves in the spotlight, for better or for worse.  We just never imagined that the worse would be this.  This time around, the support we are getting from all of our family and friends is enhanced by you all.  Perhaps that is the reason behind us being picked as the Move It! family.  Some greater being knew there was more to come for us and put us out there for the support we were going to need to get us through this.  Thank you for hanging with us.

Things are moving fast...first of all the nodule in question grew from 6 mm in diameter (January - no noticeable activity) to 1.2 cm in diameter last week (very active on the scan).  Basically it doubled in size in just about 2 months.  While we were in the oncology office, our Dr. stepped out to look for a copy of the CT to give us to take with the PET images.  He called the surgeon while he was out.  By the time he came in and started to talk to us again, the surgeon was returning his call.

Today the surgeon called Brian and set up an appt. next Monday to schedule the surgery.  While he was talking to that office, the colonoscopist (what do you call those drs?) was also calling.  The colonoscopy was already scheduled for May 5th.  Wondering if they are moving it up?  Brian didn't get back with them yet.

That is what we know now.  Keep praying, meditating, whatever it is you do.  And thanks for doing it.

You have all hope and prayer that my family can give. 

LeeAnne--this is an old friend in PA.  Please hang in there.  Rely on your faith.  I have enjoyed and been inspired by your blogs.  Know that there are many people who are praying and supporting you and your family during these trying times.  I would love to hear from you.  Contact my dad Chuck.  He can give you my email address and phone #.  Chuckles 

Hey Chuckles!  Should I write in French and you will respond in Espanol?  It is great to hear from you.  I didn't know if you were still in PA or not.  It has been soooooo long, 15years?  I am not sure if I even know how to get "Uncle Chuck."  I will see if Courtney can get your info for me.

Just goes to show how powerful the Internet is.  It not only expands around the globe, but also reaches through time.  Thanks for your prayers and support, in our Move It! life and in our cancer life.

LeeAnne

If you did write in French I would not be able to read it and to respond in Spanish well lets say that is not going to happen.  Somedays I wonder if I even have a grasp on the English language.  Just wanted you to know that I am trying to lose weight and get fit also.  After having the kids and getting wrapped up in their lives I kind of forgot about taking care of me.  Better late than never, right?  I have gone from weighing 240 lbs. to 179 lbs but I still have more to take off.  Watching what I eat and trying to exercise but like you its hard to do that all the time.  And with my work schedule its even harder.  I would still like to lose another 40 lbs.  I look forward to hearing from you.  I have so much to tell you.  Fifteen years is a long time.  Keep your chin up and knowing you--you will be fine.  Tell all of your family that I send my love. 

 

Wow, Pam, I am so proud of you!  What are you doing?  And you apparently have the willpower to do it by yourself.  Right now willpower is not what I have a lot of.

You are exactly right about getting wrapped up in our kids lives and not taking care of ourselves.  That is where I am what someone called me last night "a Mayo Massachist."  I do so much for our school and my children that I totally neglect myself.  The reason we applied for the Move It! program is so that we could slow down and take care of ourselves, with the kids involved.

LeeAnne and Brian,

I believe there are more people than you know praying for your family every day ... they just don't blog.  Please rest in assurance that your family has been lifted in prayer and will continue each day to be lifted in prayer during the upcoming months.  Brian's calmness is a great advantage as well as your mental stability :)  You wouldn't be human if you didn't cry and I'm sure that you're feeling better now then compared to when you both first found out.  Please, please, please keep all of us updated which helps our prayers to be more specific.  Forgive me if I sound all preachy ... I just want to encourage you that so many of us care ............

Sloan

The Dr.'s visit today was mostly a waste of time.  This was the surgeon.  He told us that if the colonoscopy shows anything positive, then we will have surgery to take it out.  He then said if the colonoscopy cannot find anything, then we will have surgery to find it and then take it out.  DUH!  So we are having the colonoscopy on May 5th. 

I am going to take a shower!