What do you think?  With all the uproar over the DHS issue, could a common discipline that many parent use with their children get caught up in all of this and suddenly become considered abuse?

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jd4fox23

I hope not.  Actually  I don't think enough kids get spanked or even disciplined.  My mom would whoop me with a stick when I misbehaved, and I am so glad she did not listen to the whole don't spank your children or it's child abuse phase back in the 80's.  Otherwise I would've been a disaster.

I do not think spanking your children should be considered abuse. However, there are some parents out there that take it to the extreme and uncontrollably spank their kids. That usually happens with the parent(s) gets really upset and don't take a minute to calm down before addressing their children. I have 2 small children and usually when they misbehave, I try to work it out with words or stand them in the corner (which honestly only works half the time). When no other options work is when I resort to spanking. So with that, if I have any advice for parents out there it would be to try to use other options before resorting to spanking your kids. And if you have to spank, take a minute to calm down so you dont overdo it......

My Dad would spank me pretty hard when I acted up..  There is nothing wrong with spanking your kid HARD.  But there is a line that should not be crossed which leads to real abuse.

Kids do need good discipline but abuseing a child is one of the lowest things a person can do.

I'm sorry  whomever came up with  spanking your children  is abuse  needs to get a spanking themselves. I grew up getting spankings and I   turned out alright . I remember when  I was a little girl   I call myself being  hardheaded  soon as my mom called my name  I knew I was introuble.  "Go get a switch! " , she say If I got the wrong one she   pick it  and it wasnt pretty. She would say   I'm going to spank the black out of you and make you look whiter then Micheal Jackson. I guess thats how I learned how to dance dodging my moms hits against my bottom.  Now   I do agree with  the early post don't spank kids  when your angery and out of control. Calm down first , let the child know what they have done wrong, have them sit or stand  them in corner  than spank .

fang:

I'm sorry  whomever came up with  spanking your children  is abuse  needs to get a spanking themselves. I grew up getting spankings and I   turned out alright . I remember when  I was a little girl   I call myself being  hardheaded  soon as my mom called my name  I knew I was introuble.  "Go get a switch! " , she say If I got the wrong one she   pick it  and it wasnt pretty. She would say   I'm going to spank the black out of you and make you look whiter then Micheal Jackson. I guess thats how I learned how to dance dodging my moms hits against my bottom.  Now   I do agree with  the early post don't spank kids  when your angery and out of control. Calm down first , let the child know what they have done wrong, have them sit or stand  them in corner  than spank .

You know, its funny. back in the day. You better watch out in some communities it was okay for neighbors, cousins, grannies, friends. who ever was around in your neighborhood  would whip your little butt. Now, if the mom mearly gives the kid a whippin and the kid goes to school and says something about it, that kid can be taken away.

Yes I agree as well, that a child shouldn't be hit any where but there butt, and if your going to do it, wait till you cool off. and limit yourself to how many swings, because back in the day... there wasn't no counting, it was until mom or dad got done!!! Some of you know!!!

My mom, didn't spank me that much. I guess I wasn't that bad, just mouthy. and she just wasn't that type so when I did get one, I thought it was the end of the world. I remember one time she made me go get a switch. I picked the craziest one, I brought it in, she just looked at me. She said dont be funny go get another one, so I brought a little bitty one in. (she told me this later, that she was laughing at me) so, I went back out and got another one. A BIG one. the whole branch!!! ( I was always a funny child) So, yeah by that time she said she was MAD.... she went out and got it, she came back in. Took her slow sweet time peeling it off making it smooth, then said "drop em" Yeah I started dancing all around the kitchen. Remind you she never really spanked me so this really caught me off guard, but I was being a mouth that day, she was helping me with my homework and I kept talking back. (guess she got tired of it) needless to say I didn't talk back for awhile.  

I think some kids have to get a spankin in order to get them back in line, and others you can sit and talk to them. I have three boys, my 12yr was the type that needed one every now and then, he was hard headed. He is older now and he doesn't get them anymore. the 8 yr old, he hardly ever gets or has had one, very few far and in between, I dont know if its that he learned from his older brother, but he is the type you can talk to him and he will listen and pretty much do what you tell him. The 3rd one, well he is only 8 mos. So, he has a long while!!! smile.....

We discipline our kids with spankings, and they work.  Kids are getting it too easy these days.  They run around restaurants, movie theaters, and other public places and the parents don't do a thing except tell them stop.  And you see the child smile and keep going.  My kids would have been told once, and if it were kept up, they would have gotten a spanking.  I spank in public as well.  I don't hit repeatedly, but I do give them a good whack on the behind. 

People complain that kids aren't disciplined, yet when you do in public, they want to give you their opinion on spanking, but they don't want your kids running around acting up.  Double standard doesn't work my friends.  If my little one is throwing a fit, screaming or yelling, and running around like little idiots, yeah, I'm going to let them know that's unacceptable by giving them a spanking.

When we all go out to eat, and my kids are 6,5 ,3, and 3 months, people give the rolling eyes and want to move.  But, by the end of their meal or ours we get a compliment on their manners, how quiet they are, and how well the behave at the table.  That's because we DISCIPLINE them with spankings, yet we show them as much love as we can.  And I LOVE it when I get  compliments on my kids!  They deserve it!

Tinuviel_33:

We discipline our kids with spankings, and they work.  Kids are getting it too easy these days.  They run around restaurants, movie theaters, and other public places and the parents don't do a thing except tell them stop.  And you see the child smile and keep going.  My kids would have been told once, and if it were kept up, they would have gotten a spanking.  I spank in public as well.  I don't hit repeatedly, but I do give them a good whack on the behind. 

People complain that kids aren't disciplined, yet when you do in public, they want to give you their opinion on spanking, but they don't want your kids running around acting up.  Double standard doesn't work my friends.  If my little one is throwing a fit, screaming or yelling, and running around like little idiots, yeah, I'm going to let them know that's unacceptable by giving them a spanking.

When we all go out to eat, and my kids are 6,5 ,3, and 3 months, people give the rolling eyes and want to move.  But, by the end of their meal or ours we get a compliment on their manners, how quiet they are, and how well the behave at the table.  That's because we DISCIPLINE them with spankings, yet we show them as much love as we can.  And I LOVE it when I get  compliments on my kids!  They deserve it!

That's how we are too with our three boys, 12yr 8yr and 8 mos. The big ones are older now but from the time they were old enough o get spankings, they got them and they will to this dad say "Yes" and not "yeah" and they will say yes mam, no sir. They know it all and will show respect to all!

They didn't have to spank me much for me to learn a lesson.  After a while, fear of a spanking was sufficient to get the point across.  I think its a valid discipline.  I think by allowing spanking to be called child abuse, we cheapen and demean the true depth of cruelty. 

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Lindsay and the red dogs

Spanking is NOT abuse. That's what's wrong with all these kids running around uncontrollably, being loud, obnoxious, and half the time make going out to eat, or grocery shopping a very UNenjoyable event. I spank my son, on his BUTT. That's what their butts are for. Some parents take it to extreme, and beat their kids upside their head or anywhere else they feel like. THAT is abuse, spanking your child's BUTT, and discipline are NOT abuse. DHS needs a grip on reality. They make you afraid to discipline your children in public places for fear someone will turn you in. I'm sorry but if my son acts like half the little brats you see at any public place, you can turn me in, cause I am spanking his little butt!

I have been to restaurants with my fiance' and son, and couples have literally complimented us on "being able to enjoy their dinner for once". One little old couple gave my son a dollar because he was so well behaved, and my son knows that good behavior gets rewarded.

On Father's day at Golden Corral, my fiance' and I were appalled because two little boys (not old enought to be wondering around by themselves) had their entire hands in the candy portion of the buffet line, and my fiance' told their parents, and the parents just looked at him, and kept talkin on their cell phones. WAKE UP people. Control your kids, then maybe we won't have so many problem children or children in jail before they are ever even adults.

ChristiansMomma:

Spanking is NOT abuse. That's what's wrong with all these kids running around uncontrollably, being loud, obnoxious, and half the time make going out to eat, or grocery shopping a very UNenjoyable event. I spank my son, on his BUTT. That's what their butts are for. Some parents take it to extreme, and beat their kids upside their head or anywhere else they feel like. THAT is abuse, spanking your child's BUTT, and discipline are NOT abuse. DHS needs a grip on reality. They make you afraid to discipline your children in public places for fear someone will turn you in. I'm sorry but if my son acts like half the little brats you see at any public place, you can turn me in, cause I am spanking his little butt!

I have been to restaurants with my fiance' and son, and couples have literally complimented us on "being able to enjoy their dinner for once". One little old couple gave my son a dollar because he was so well behaved, and my son knows that good behavior gets rewarded.

On Father's day at Golden Corral, my fiance' and I were appalled because two little boys (not old enought to be wondering around by themselves) had their entire hands in the candy portion of the buffet line, and my fiance' told their parents, and the parents just looked at him, and kept talkin on their cell phones. WAKE UP people. Control your kids, then maybe we won't have so many problem children or children in jail before they are ever even adults.

I agree with you 100%, I am for spankings!! We get the same thing when we go places. Our boys are very polite. I couldn't have it any other way. I do think that some kids need spankings more then others, some kids listen better then others. Example, my oldest got more spankings then the younger brother, maybe it was from seeing him get in trouble (dont know) or it may have been that he was easier to handle with just talking to him. but he has never had to have that many spankings.

I am for spankings, not abuse. After or before I would ever spank one of my children I always talked to them, asked them if they knew why they were getting a spanking? and I would always tell them "I love them". Communication is always good with your kids, talk to them, let them know how much you care. And dont ever spank when your mad!! Take a time out for yourself, if your that mad, dont even give them one...wait till you cooled off and go and talk to them! 

I totally agree.  And IF and when one of my children gets a whack on the bottom in public, and someone gives me the evil eye, I out right ask them if they would take over if they have a better way.  That usually gets them to thinking and backing off.  It's usually the people who have never been a parent that holler "child abuse" when they see a child spanked.  Honestly, I think it is because we are so fearful of spanking and actually disciplining our children, that today's kids are out of control.  Get a grip people!  Yes, there are some who take it to the extreme, and those are the ones that make the news.  What we DON'T hear about are the kids that got spanked but go on to be exemplary students, doctors, attorneys, lawmakers, etc. because THAT just wouldn't be newsworthy.  I would wager that at least 99% of adults age 35 and up were spanked as kids--and look at us.  Now look at today's crime statistics and what do you find?  A bunch of miscreants that were never spanked or correctly disciplined, or loved.  Wake up America!

My mom was so good, all she had to do was look at us if we were up to no good.  MrsPr gave some good advice and I use the same techniques with my girls 3 and 5.

ariel:

My mom was so good, all she had to do was look at us if we were up to no good.  MrsPr gave some good advice and I use the same techniques with my girls 3 and 5.

Thanks Ariel!! You know I dont get too much praise on here. Most everyone is against me.

That's how I am now with the boys, most of the time I can look at them and they know!! Its funny! Its funny how you can train them. They are my little guys, I love them to death and would do anything for them. Correcting them is something that they need, they need to learn and understand they cant get away with what ever they want. Their good kids. I am very proud of them, my 8 yr old went to basketball camp and out of all the 3rd graders, he won 1st place on the 1 on 1, 3 on 3, 5 on 5, hotshot and he won the MVP award. The oldest one plays football, his season will start pretty soon and he will wow everyone with his great ability to catch the football and run for a touch down. As you can tell they are good kids, but it wasn't easy. It took discipline, hard work and dedication.

MrsPR USA:

Thanks Ariel!! You know I dont get too much praise on here. Most everyone is against me.

Just a thought here ....  hopefully, most people don't feel that disagreement with someone equals dislike for a person.  :)

btw ... my kids are 22, 19, and 18.  We homeschooled them all from the very beginning.  My son, just turned 18, is finishing up his final subject in order to graduate.  The last 2 years, he also went to Tulsa Technology Center and took Computer Networking and Internet Security and made A's all the way through.  Since Tech is out for the summer, he's now working a full-time job and fixing to graduate, too.  My middle child, a girl 19, finished up over a year ago and now she's working full time and taking online classes to get a 2 yr degree in Business.  My oldest daughter graduated from ORU in May with a 4 yr degree in Literary Writing, a week later got married, and moved out of state.  :D

When kids are young you think they'll never get through all the school learning, let along get through all the peer pressure and problems life can hand them as they grow up, but I think if a parent is there for them and sticks with them like glue, those kids will end up doing more than we could ever imagine for them. 

 

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jd4fox23